From Helping Children at Home and School Edited by Andrea S. Canter and Servio A. Carroll Self-Control Skills for Children: A Handout for Teachers by Louise K. Eckman, Community College of Allegheny County (PA) Overview Normally, children will learn self-control as they progress from kindergarten through high school. Learning when to sit, when to stand, when to talk, when to keep silent, and how to handle situations with peers is a big part of growing up. For some children these lessons will come easily; others may not learn self-control without planned intervention from teachers and parents. What is self-control? Self-control is a skill which enables the child to suppress undesirable, inappropriate behaviors, and act in a socially approved way. It enables him or her to ÒdecideÓ how to behave, and choose a good course of action. Children are not born with self-control; it is an acquired skill. How do children learn self-control? Many children learn self-control by watching other children. Through observation and practice, they learn how to behave. They are often eager to behave well and earn the approval of teachers and peers. However, there are a significant number of children who do not learn self-control readily by observing others. They will learn more effectively through direct teaching with the use of rewards and consequences. Teaching Self Control It is important to select age-appropriate goals for the child to whom you wish to teach self-control. Engage the studentÕs cooperation by discussing goal area(s) with the student. Encourage him/her to join you in a project to improve his/her behavior in specific ways. Try one simple goal at first, where the probability of success is high. Then other goals can be added. Some examples: First Grade: stay in seat, raise your hand Third Grade: do not talk while others are talking, stay out of fights Fifth Grade: ignore those who are teasing, listen to directions What strategies will work? Once behavioral goals have been identified, a strategy for teaching self- control should be selected. Some classroom management ideas for children to help develop a sense of control are listed below: ¥ Use prompts: seat the student near the front of the class where prompting can be carried out unobtrusively; remind the student of the new goal by using a pre-arranged signal Ñ a touch on the shoulder or a hand signal ¥ Review student progress frequently: let him/her know how he/she is doing ¥ Enlist the cooperation of parents ¥ Reduce distractions: keep manipulative materials away from the learner unless he/she needs them for a specific learning activity ¥ Help students make transitions: always follow a stimulating activity with a quiet time (resting head on desk, for example) to help students learn how to shift gears ¥ Use flexible work spaces: some students may work better on the floor, than at a desk ¥ Teach attending skills: students can be taught to fold hands together or put them in pockets when quiet attention is needed ¥ Contracts: use contracts to specify desired behavior ¥ Avoid embarrassing student: avoid verbal attacks or commands in front of other students ¥ Use reinforcement: The key to success is in reinforcing the student consistently for progress made. You might want to discuss reinforcement with the student in advance. Praise and attention are the most important reinforcers. Other possible reinforcers might be an extra privilege in the classroom, or a treat provided by parents. ¥ Use self-regulation programs: Once the student has experienced some success in achieving self-control with this teacher-conducted approach, a self-regulation program might be tried. Self-regulation should be used only when other self-control objectives have been achieved, and only if the student shows interest in changing his/her behavior more independently. The steps are the same Ñ gaining the studentÕs cooperation through discussion, selecting a goal, selecting a strategy and planning for reinforcement. With self-regulation, the teacher assists the student with step one, planning for change, and step four, providing reinforcement. Resources Colorosa, B. (1994). Kids are worth it: Giving your child the gift of inner discipline. New York: Wm. Morrow. Evertson, C., Emmer, E. Clements, B,. & Worsham, M. (1994). Classroom management for elementary teachers. Needham Heights, MA: Allyn and Bacon. Savage, T.V. (1991). Discipline for self-control. Englewood Cliffs, NJ: Prentice Hall. (c) 1998 National Association of School Psychologists, 4340 East West Highway, Suite 402, Bethesda MD 20814 301-657-0270. Permission is granted for personal use. downloaded at www.schoolhousedoor.com